Tis’ the season for pruning! Relationship pruning that is. The end of the year is a good time to take a look at the quality of our relationships and the influences that have found their way into our lives over the past eleven months. The better our relationships are, the greater our potential for success and sustained happiness. Just as importantly, the better our relationships are, the better chance we have at maintaining good physical health and a strong immune system.

Thirty years ago many scientists would have scoffed at the idea that your health could be affected by what goes on in your mind or with your emotions. But today, the mind-body connection is widely accepted.

Scientists now know that the immune system talks to the brain and the brain talks to the immune system. These connections play an important role in both preventing disease and maintaining your health. However, the brain doesn’t exist in isolation. It is intimately tied to our environments. Our environments include the social networks we develop throughout our lives.

The Immune System and Social Networks

Even when we are physically alone, we still carry our close and intimate connections within us.

In her book The Balance Within: The Science Connecting Health and Emotions, Dr. Esther Sternberg notes that “[s]omewhere in our brains we carry a map of our relationships. It is our Mother’s lap, our best friend’s holding hand, our lover’s embrace –all these we carry within ourselves when we are alone. Just knowing that these are there to hold us if we fall gives us a sense of peace.”

With this internal map of connections, we are better able to navigate the world and its terms. We benefit from the social bonds we form as if they are an extension of our immune system. Imagine your family, friends and social support networks as a vast collection of immune cells striving to maintain your health and protect you from disease. Healthy interactions support healthier attitudes, outlooks and behaviors. Thus through our emotions and their maintenance, our social networks are tied into our inner immune network.

What makes social connections healthful

Scientists are still exploring how biological and behavioral factors account for the health benefits of connecting with others. For example, countless studies have shown that making connections, even momentary ones, helps to relieve harmful levels of stress, which can adversely affect coronary arteries, gut function, insulin regulation, and the immune system. Other lines of research have shown that caring behaviors trigger the release of stress reducing hormones in the brain.

Research has also identified a range of activities that qualify as social support, from offers of help, the doing of formal service work, or the simple giving of friendly advice, to expressions of affection, appreciation and love. Evidence suggests that the life-enhancing effects of social support extend to the giver as well as to receiver. The simple act of getting out of oneself can have a material impact on moods, perspectives and outlooks on life.

All of this is encouraging news because caring involvement with others may be one of the easiest health strategies to access. It’s inexpensive, it requires no special equipment or regimen and we can engage in it in many ways.

Loneliness

Contrastingly, loneliness can have dramatic consequences for your health. Loneliness can lead to disrupted sleep patterns, elevated blood pressure, and increased cortisol (a stress hormone). It can affect your immune system and decrease your overall sense of contentment. Loneliness is also a risk factor for antisocial behaviour, depression and suicide.

Older people are particularly vulnerable. If your mobility decreases, it can be harder to get together with other people. However, older people who remain connected with others and have strong relationships are likely to: have a better quality of life; be more satisfied with their life; and have a lower risk of dementia and mental decline need less domestic support.

Younger people (teenagers and people in their 20s) are also at risk when they are isolated. A lack of social relationships can have a direct impact on a young person’s physical wellbeing by increasing the risk of obesity, inflammation and high blood pressure.

Strengthening ties this holiday season

Around the holidays, it’s easy to get caught up in the whirl of social activities and perhaps lose track of their deeper purpose: providing an opportunity for people to come together. Of course, not all forms of holiday conviviality are health-promoting — eating or drinking excessively, for example. Likewise, social contacts don’t uniformly enhance our well-being. (Take inventory. Choose wisely. Prune and move-on)

So, during this busy season, take time to foster your most meaningful relationships. Choose activities that are most likely to bring joy to you and the people you care about. Delegate or discard tasks that eat into your time, or do them together with family or friends. And if you can’t get together with everyone you’d like, make plans to see them post-holiday.

By, Sahmra A. Stevenson, Esq. (“Your Family’s Personal Lawyer”)

S.A. Stevenson Law Offices, LLC

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